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so you want to grow up


So, you want to grow up?

I was recently being my bad ass self...of which I might add has taken me a little while to be more me than I ever can be but i get closer every day, I was told to "tone it down, to “grow up a little, it’s not right to be seen this way, you’re embarrassing yourself”, to be blatantly honest I completely shut down these attacks on my deepest being straight away, I just could not tolerate it.

I reacted from the heart, not in anger, just for the parable.

“And what!! be like you? the minute I grow up will be the day after I die”

From this day onwards, those words have stuck with me every day, I empowered these thoughts and compounded them from then on wards, throwing inhibitions and restrictions that kept that beautiful exertion in, I mean jeez!! on how many occasions have you thought, oh no I can’t do that! or I shouldn’t, how many chances do you think you have……

Once confronted, I did say “with everything I have learned throughout my life there isn’t a fathom of a chance I can be like everyone else I AM ME!, "those people (pointing an imaginative finger) have given up their youth, for what ? and at what age?" was it slowly bled from them?, to be normal, to be boring, because I’m telling you now someone who is boring is underneath a thick blanket of judgement, suffering a feeling of not being adequate, a feeling of not being enough, a feeling of looking "stupid" , what will they think of me...

For example,

at the trampoline park today, I was the only parent taking part, every adult was sat down and you might say they were too old, injured, ill, but every one of them ???? engrossed in their smart phones, ( i see that one everywhere , it's shocking!! ) there is nothing wrong with spectating but the confidence you radiate to your children from also taking part in what you want them to take part in will build strong foundations in their independence.

Watch me, I have no inhibitions, my feelings don’t govern me and people’s perception of what I am doing definitely doesn’t, let your shine shine bright and effect those around you, even the other children took direction from this and I all of a sudden i looked around the trampoline park all eyes were on me, not their children, yes some of them may have been judging but all I saw were smiles.

You think you are too old, to grown up.

I think not, drop the facade, drop the mask for before you know it you will be telling yourself on your death bed, "oh I wish I really would have made more of an effort with my ideas, goals, worried less and really lived a bit more, there’s nothing wrong with taking care of business, having transport, a shelter, currency, you have to remember though and believe it or not, you weren’t put on the planet to work until your bodies are so tired and worn you only have a few years to enjoy life without labour, that’s right, you were put here to dance through the woods, sleep wild and never lose your fire, you were not made to work your ass off your whole life, it’s just all you know that’s all.

Once you stop you deteriorate, that’s a fact, after the age of 24 you stop growing, so if you stop growing what do you think happens, your body deteriorates, you have to exercise in order to carry on growing from that point onwards, exercising your body and your mind, feeding it with emotional intellect, dropping all of this preconditioned “stuff” you’ve been taught, and I know this is a very hard thing to conceptualise in the beginning but believe me once you make yourself aware, you actually start to live, so the sooner you wake you up the better, what I’m saying is all those people you’ve listened to are just telling you things that they have listened to, listening to your mind is sometimes harmful, the mind will try to trick you, keep your attention, keep things consistent, safe, the mind is a tool, you can pick it up and put it down, it shouldn’t make your decisions it should help you, if you think something looks fun or might be fun, then ten times out of ten it will be.

You are missing opportunities because your rational mind is making the decisions for you, or "SOCIETY" frowns upon this, sometimes it’s best to tell your mind, SHUT THE HECK UP!

I ignite fresh fires inside of people and I also keep them from dying out, there is no other way except happiness and fun, what’s the point if it isn’t any other way than this?? I witnessed this today and the day I was also told to rein it in by a friend, I was also told after I had expressed my views on what he thought I ought to be doing, "Sorry" and that I had made him think.

Let me put this into perspective for you, we are specs of dust in the wind compared to the time and grand scale of things, sometimes it’s a sobering thought to remember we are floating through space in a universe that is billions of years old, we are miracles and are part of something bigger than we will ever know and we will never be able to conceptualise this, the world’s top scientists can’t even figure this out, isn’t it crazy then how we are all caught up in this stressful way of existing, “please don’t ever grow up, you haven’t got the time”, you’ll know who I am when you see me, I call this gentle anarchy, I’m not fighting against anything but if I can make just one of you wake up the cards will start to fall, just don’t grow up, let the body grow up, not your conscious mind, that lasts forever, it was here before as everything was and will be here long after we leave these weird vessels, if you feel like you want help getting back to life give me a holler, I’ve got any ones back that is struggling with the norm, is just waking up and needs some guidance, or knows someone that needs a little hand.

Adam Constable.

14/4/2018


 

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